Sunday, June 21, 2015

Own Your Farts

People fart in the library pretty often.  It tends to be the same people over and over, which I can't really understand? Are they doing it on purpose?  Is there a medical issue causing frequent, uncontrollable farts?  I don't know...regardless, I'm always pretty grossed out when it happens.

Here's the thing-- no one ever acknowledges their farts!  No "excuse me".  No "Whoops!". No "I'm sorry." Nothing.  There's one guy who is a regular farter that I'm fairly convinced just doesn't care.  His are too loud and long to assume he just can't hear himself do it.  He has to at least have some sort of sensation going on that would clue him in?  I've always thought that I would apologize/excuse myself if I passed gas audibly in public.  But today I started to question myself.

A woman came in and about 7 feet from me let out a rather loud, quick fart.  It stopped her in her tracks.  I knew she had realized what she had done.  At that point, she quickly walked away to another corner of the library.  Which got me thinking that maybe she thought that if she just ignored it, I might not know where it came from? Oh I did.  Don't get me wrong.  I know.  But I think she was really just going for plausible deniability.

I'm now questioning what the hell I'd actually do if I farted in public.

Like really seriously questioning.

And that's the sort of day I'm having.....

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